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Discussion questions

These questions can be used by you alone, with a friend, or your Faith Group to discuss "If I Perish" from Esther 4-5, preached February 22, 2026. This is the third of five messages in the series "For Such A Time As This."  

Open your group with a prayer. Use these questions as a guide; select the points you want to discuss.

GETTING STARTED  

Before we dive into Esther 4–5, let’s loosen up a bit. These questions are meant to get us talking about courage, risk, and those “knot in your stomach” moments we’ve all experienced.​

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  1. What’s the most awkward conversation you’ve ever had to start? (No details required… just the category!)

  2. Have you ever postponed a hard conversation for way too long? What finally made you deal with it?

  3. What’s something small that felt terrifying the first time you did it? (Public speaking? Asking someone out? Driving in Philly traffic?)

  4. If you had to choose, which is harder for you: Speaking up and risking conflict Or staying quiet and living with the tension? Why?

  5. When was the last time you felt that “knot in your stomach” because you knew you needed to do the right thing?

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DIGGING DEEPER

Esther 4–5 is a turning point in the story. The tension rises, courage is tested, and God is still not mentioned by name. These questions are designed to help us see the depth of what’s happening beneath the surface.​

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  1. In Esther 4:1–3, how does Mordecai respond to the decree? What does his public grief communicate about the seriousness of the threat?

  2. Esther initially resists Mordecai’s request (Esther 4:10–11). What does her response reveal about the real danger she faced in approaching the king?

  3. Read Esther 4:13–14 carefully. What does Mordecai’s statement suggest about his view of God’s providence, even though God’s name is never mentioned?

  4. In Esther 4:16, Esther says, “If I perish, I perish.” What has changed in her posture between verses 11 and 16? What does that shift reveal about courage?

  5. Esther calls for a three-day fast (Esther 4:16). Even though prayer is not mentioned in the book, what does fasting typically represent in Scripture? Read Joel 2:12–13. How does this deepen our understanding of what may be happening spiritually?

  6. Read Proverbs 21:1. How does this verse shed light on Esther’s decision to approach the king, knowing his heart is ultimately in God’s hands?

  7. In chapter 5, Esther does not immediately present her request. Why do you think she invites the king and Haman to a banquet instead? What does this reveal about wisdom and timing?

  8. Read Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7. How do these verses help us understand Esther’s strategy of waiting rather than speaking immediately?

  9. Haman leaves the first banquet “joyful and glad of heart” (Esther 5:9), but his joy collapses when he sees Mordecai. What does this reveal about the instability of pride?

  10. Read Proverbs 16:18. How does this proverb illuminate what is unfolding in Haman’s heart in chapter 5?

  11. Haman builds the gallows before he has secured final permission to use it (Esther 5:14). What does this reveal about the nature of unchecked anger and self-deception?

  12. Throughout chapters 4–5, God remains unnamed. How does His hiddenness actually intensify our awareness of His providence at work?

 

​LIVING IT OUT

Esther’s moment wasn’t theoretical. It was personal, relational, and costly. These questions are meant to help us wrestle honestly with what obedience looks like in our real lives, especially when speaking about Christ feels risky.​

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  1. Where in your life right now do you feel that “stomach knot,” the sense that you need to say something or step forward spiritually, but it could cost you?

  2. Esther had to reveal her identity at the right moment. In your world (family, workplace, neighborhood), where are you tempted to keep your faith private to avoid tension?

  3. What fears most often hold you back from speaking about Jesus: rejection, awkwardness, damaging a relationship, being misunderstood, losing influence? Which one feels most real to you?

  4. How do you discern the difference between wise timing (strategy) and simple avoidance (fear)? What helps you tell the difference?

  5. Think about someone specific in your life who doesn’t know Christ. What would “using your position” look like with them, without being pushy or artificial?

  6. Have you ever experienced a moment when obedience felt risky, but afterward you saw God’s hand in it? What happened?

  7. If “silence doesn’t mean absence,” how does believing in God’s providence give you courage in gospel conversations that feel uncertain or slow?

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